Best Quotes

1 What’s That? Uh-Huh… Is That So? Hamm… I See… Well F*** You Mr. Bear! You Speak Lies….Lies!!!
Ok, What Did You Break? What’s Your Excuse? And How Much Will It Cost Me?

2 Cocaine Is God’s Ways Of Saying You're Making Too Much Money.

3 All Peace And No War Make Bush A Dull Boy.

4 Just When You Think You've Hit Bottom, Someone Throws You A Shovel.

5 After All Is Said And Done, A Hell Of A Lot More Is Said Than Done.

6 Fate Is Just What You Call It When You Don’t Know The Name Of The Person Screwing You Over.

7 If I’M Not Back In 5 Minutes…Wait Longer.

8 Always Remember You Are Unique, Just Like Everyone Else.

9 Life May Have No Meaning…Or Worse, It May Have A Meaning Of Which I Disapprove.

10 I Told My Psychiatrist That Everyone Hates Me. He Said I Was Being Ridiculous- Everyone Hasn't Met Me Yet.

11 Am I Getting Smart With You? How Would You Know?

12 I Didn't Say It Was Your Fault, I Said I Was Going To Blame You.

13 Everybody Is Somebody Else’s Weirdo.

14 Do Not Meddle In The Affairs Of Dragons Because, To Them, You Are Crunchy And Taste Good With Ketchup.

15 I Don't Have An Attitude Problem, You Have A Perception Problem.

16 Everyone Makes Mistakes; The Trick Is Making Them When No One’s Around.

17 Do You Have Trouble Making Up Your Mind? Well, Yes Or No?

18 The Most Exciting Word In Science Is Not ‘Eureka’ (I Found It) But ‘That’s Funny…’

19 I Stayed Up All Night Playing Poker With Tarot Cards. I Got A Full House And 4 People Died.

20 War Does Not Determine Who Is Right, Only Who Is Left.

21 Always Forgive You Enemies, Nothing Annoys Them More.

22 People Like You Are The Reason People Like Me Need Medication.

23 Kiss Me Twice. I’M Schizophrenic.

24 Live Fast, Die Young, And Leave A Good Looking Corpse Behind.

25 Death Is Life’S Way Of Telling You – You're Fired. Suicide Is Your Way Of Telling Life You Quit.

26 You’Re Not An Alcoholic Unless You Go To The Meetings.

27 I’Ve Given Up Trying To Escape From Reality; They Always Find Me Anyway.

28 If You Think There Is Good In Everybody, You Haven’T Met Everybody.

29 Next Time You Wave At Me, Use More Than One Finger, Please!

30 Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, And I Once Thought I Was Ugly, Until I Saw You!